Paid Professional Solicitors...save time, just send your money to me

"Hi", the caller says when I answer the phone.
Recognizing the next standard question, "ïs this Mr."yaddayaddayadda?, I respond with my standard, "depends on who's calling and what you're calling about".

The caller said he was "Joe" with the XYZ Fire Department. My next standard question: "Are you a paid, professional solicitor"?

North Carolina law requires the caller to be truthful. By law I mean that if they lie, they have committed a crime. The callers are told about people like me. They are fully aware of this law.

He answered truthfully, and I politiely told him we did no business over the phone, and requested he put this number on his Do Not Call List.

 That's when it started going downhill.

His tone changed, and he indignantly said, "may I ask why"? My tone remained the same (to which even I was surprised). "Because I told you to". He didn't like the response, of course, and by this time, I didn't care. I made sure he understood me. He said he did, and that he would "try to put me on the list".

Let me explain phone solicitations and charities just one more time. Well, one more time tonight. I have not problem with needy, worthwhile, productive organizations collecting funds. Many volunteer fire departments do it to raise money they need to stay in business. And, in most cases, they do a great job. There are any number of similar groups that perform great services for the people in their communities.

Unfortunately, there are as many "professional" solicitors who contract with these organizations, and collect donations or sell tickets to all sorts of events (ever been to one of those circuses to benefit needy children???), and give the profits to the host organization. I hate to once again burst anyone's bubble, but the North Carolina Department of State has compiled figures on such solicitations. The profits are less than 10-percent of the monies collected. More than 90 cents out of every dollar you donate to these charities goes to the expenses of the professional solicitors. No doubt, they have expenses. They were paying my latest caller eight bucks and hour. I did not keep him on the phone long enough to find out what tickets he was selling, or if he was just looking for a handout. I did not, and do not, care.

If you want to give money to a worthwhile organization, I encourage you to do that. Write a check, grab some cash from the ATM...and either mail it or better, yet, TAKE it to that organization. That way, 100-percent of your donation will end up in their hands, not a mere thin dime.

Of course, for security reasons, you should NEVER give anything over the phone to ANYONE who calls you. If you want to do business like that, though, please send me your credit card number, along with that three digit number on the back, plus your birthdate, your mother's maiden name, the name of your dog (one of the most commonly used passwords, along with your birthdate, by the way), and the last four digits of your social security number. Save yourself the hassle of being tied up on the phone while I rip you off.