Southern Confidence

This one is, for the most part, non-political.
It's just downright funny.
I got it in one of the dozens of e-mails making the rounds each day. I like all of them, but some are those laugh-out-loud kind.
This is one.
And, it's worth sharing.

President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang.
"Hello, President Obama” a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Archie, down here at Joe's Catfish Shack, in Charleston, and I am callin' to tell ya’ll that we are officially declaring war on ya!"
"Well Archie," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news!
How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Harold, my next-door-neighbor Randy, and the whole dart team from Hooters. That makes eight!"
Barack paused. "I must tell you, Archie, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Wow," said Archie. "I'll have to call ya back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. “Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?" Barack asked.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry’s farm tractor."
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you, Archie, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to two million since we last spoke."
"Lord above", said Archie, "I'll be getting back to ya."
Sure enough, Archie called again the next day.
“President Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war."
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed two million prisoners."

SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN

Ya'll have a good Super Bowl Sunday. I guess it's this weekend. I am not much of a TV sports fan. Saw the first Super Bowl way back then. And, I likely have seen only one since then in it's entirety. No, I am not un-American. I would rather watch a game in person than on the little screen.
I'm not even sure who's playing, but I am glad it's not Chicago. That'll save all of us a lot of money because the President won't be taking his relatives and friends to the big event.